Archive | No, just no. RSS feed for this section

Road Trip with a Side of a Patty Melt.

4 Aug

For our 7 year anniversary, (this past June, yeah I procrastinate!) James had planned a travel down the Oregon coast, something I’ve been telling him he has to see for years now, for a 3 night camping trip. We dusted off our gear, (it had been way to long since the last time we camped,) planned and prepared the menu and loaded up the truck and dogs. We left early as the campsite was a 6 1/2 hour drive, and a beautiful day and drive it was.

Then, this happened. What should be a Yelp review (but won’t) is coming your way. It took about an hour longer than we’d planned when we stopped for a quick bite and beer at a dog friendly restaurant in Newport, OR. Found it on the BringFido app and it was at a Rouge Brewing Co. restaurant, and, being a well established name it had to be good, right? Wrong!!

We lucked out and found a parking spot right next to the patio, where I presume we’ll be sitting with the pups, πŸ‘πŸ»we were told to seat ourselves with a heads up that the food might take around 30 mins. That’s cool, I appreciate the knowing what I’m getting myself into. Unfamiliar with the area, and again, a well known name, we accepted it. Then 5 mins passed, 10, maybe 15 until we actually were greeted by our server. And as a person well versed of the industry myself I know how customers can TOTALLY over exaggerate a time frame. I assure you I am not. Now, “why didn’t you just leave?” you may be thinking. It’s a 3 fold response. 1, dogs. 2, wanting our truck, full of monies worth of camping gear and foods within eyesight βœ”οΈ. 3, small town, small roads, big truck (see reason #2). So we wait, every few mins saying, “Let’s just wait another minute and we’ll leave.” Alas, there she is!! She was apologetic so that’s cool, even though I’d seen her at the table across from us, twice, we are fully ready with our order (hoping it would expedite our departure as we still have almost 3 hours of driving,) and then proceeded to wait for our beers. We are now maybe 30+mins in. Me trying to make small talk when drinks finally come, “Wow you guys are pretty busy!” Her response, “Not Really” Really! Over 30 mins for a beer. Not Really!!?? Then another 30 mins pass, still no food. We’re sharing a fucking patty melt people! So, we order another round. When that round finally comes she says, “I have some interesting news and some good news. Which do you want first?” Interesting, bc well, I’m interested to hear any form of explanation. Turns out Mike took our sandwich to the wrong table and they’d already started eating it so, they’re making another for us right now, and she told them to, “put a rush on it“. The good news is, this round was on her. Sweet πŸΊπŸ–•πŸ»! So that rush put on our food was just that. Use your own imagination on how good it was. Thus folks, this took an hour and 45 mins!!!!! I’ll be skipping on Rogue Brewing from now on.

Oh! Damnit! I almost skipped the best part. There was a solo bathroom for both men and women, BUT, there was no way to lock the door, that I could see in the women’s so I went to the men’s. Huh? Same mother fucking thing! So I ask an employee who’s right there, “How do I lock the bathroom door?” I shit you not his response is, “That’s a good question, I don’t really know?” Followed by, “I’m not sure if you can.” If I can?!! How do you not know the answer? How has this never come up before? And is that even legal?!!!

Now that my rant is done and I hope you’re still reading, (sorry but it really was an experience that I felt I had to share, I mean, yeah,) we’re back on the road. The park. Sunset Bay.  Was beautiful! And the best part, no cell service. Nothing, nada, zilch, the whole time! I recommend taking yourselves somewhere similar, often. There was however, one way to make contact with the outside world, just in case. How many of you or people you know have never seen or used one of these!!!?? I picked it up just to hear the dial tone. (Also possibly something you or someone you know has no idea what that means or sounds like.)

Well, on the drive in, close to the park we passed a little corner store and there was a wheel barrow full of wood and a sign, “for sale.” Yeah, I made him turn around, those bundles they sell at the sites always burn faster as they rarely have any substantial sized logs. 20 bucks for the barrel, and nice cuts of logs. πŸ‘πŸ» Not positive the species but I know for damn sure that what we were burning here compared to camping in SD was in so many ways better! In SD the smoke was well, smokier, and when we’d get home it was straight up, everything in the garage-dogs get hosed down-strip naked-and get in the shower, smokier!! But this wood, none of that. Yeah there was still campfire smell but it was a happier kind. And when unloading our gear, dogs and own smelly beings at home, not that bad. Here our washer and dryer are in the house, in SD they were in the garage, so yeah, wood up here, unsurprisingly, trumps. No, wait, that’s not the right word. Maybe use, superior? Yep! That’s the one. Thanks to our unexpected “layover” we didn’t get settled in as early as we wanted, but we did. So by the time we’re ready to get that campfire going we’re teetering towards 8o’clock. Our little camping guidelines pamphlet we get says nothing about when fires must be out. Quiet time is at 10 but fires? When? So James goes to the host to inquire, and her answer is, none. “We can have a fire all night?”

“Yes, as long as you are quite and don’t disturb other campers.”

WHATTT??? Nice. πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ”₯So we got lost in the flames and embers on a beautiful quiet night. Tomorrow. We walk! We were told there’s this amazing botanical garden at Shore Acres park, just a short hike away. Fuck yeah!! So we head off. Apparently in the wrong direction as we see no signs, and end up kicked off to the road. So we turn around and head back to camp to find our pathway out. When asking the first ranger we see where the path is her response is basically “yeah, the new camp host sn’t a fan of signs. I don’t know why.” Umm, I’m sorry, but how can you be a campground host and not be a fan of letting campers know where they’re going. In the wilderness. Where they haven’t been before? I mean, at least give us an arrow! βž°πŸ”œ But, we make our way and find the path, we did walk by the same outlook twice along the way, can’t possibly imagine how that happened, but the views were worth it!! Told you so James. 

We did find that botanical garden and of course they don’t allow dogs, understand why but, Damnit! So we had to take turns to walk through it. Which of course means, while walking through the most amazing rose garden I’ve ever seen, stopping to smell the roses loses a bit of it’s charm when the husband/dog hand-off is waiting for me. But smell I did. Totally worth it.As you know we bought a rehab property, which comes with all kinds of surprises. And whatever trees, shrubs and or plants that came with it were also part of that surprise, so we had no idea what they would look like come spring. Well there is a small rose bush in our front yard that, it seemed out of nowhere, produced this beautiful rose. I’d never seem one like this before and I beamed when I saw it out my bedroom window! Tada, this is it. It’s named Scentimental. And now when I stop and smell my roses, I know her name. It was a beautiful and peaceful few days. 
Fun’s over guys! We have a yard to get together.

PORT.A WHAT????

12 Jul

Weeks ago, hahahah! Nope. Back in late May James was all excited about a present he had bought for me that was coming in the mail. It’s a surprise! He says. So of course I’m intrigued. Can anyone guess what it was? No! Every thought is wrong! Wrong! It was a port a potty! You heard me. Port.A.Potty. Now I’ll explain. Our bathroom is next up on the to-do list and needs an upgrade on a serious level. Tile, vanity and medicine cabinet, and with doing that ourselves it could possibly take more than a week. So, there’s that toilet issue, it did not need to be replaced but, just plain old had to be removed for proper laying of the tile, hence, needing a place to do our business! And then a series of events happened. 

First, I’m a procrastinator, (that has been established time and time again,) and secondly, family and friend and life shit happened. So it was put on hold. 

Then a rainbow arose 🌈 and a pot of gold landed in our backyard. Well, a couple miles away but. Dude. Some great friends of ours over the last 7 years moved up here, purely coincidental, and well sometimes, one needs a great coincidence to poop out in their backyard. (Is it just me or does this post seem to be leaning too much towards poo? πŸ€”) And don’t ever dismiss it. One of these friends happens to be someone who knows a little about everything and a lot about some things. So our project that may have taken us a week plus some days, took these two boys 3 days. And those three days, they did while I was away.  

When men take a before and after. Yeah. Cannot trust them!!  Close the lid babe. But, thank you. 

I came home to a new bathroom. While I didn’t do any actual labor, I was instrumental to this remodel. I picked out everything and damnit not surprised, totally nailed it!! Looks amazing! And while I got away with the days worth of no working toilet, there is still one last task, (besides more mother-fucking painting!) seal the tile, and that takes the better part of a day. So. I cannot get away without gracing that port a potty with this cute little bum. Hello garage. You seriously need to pick up after yourself! 

In Loving Memory

2 May

I can’t express the hole you’ve left in our lives. 

I can’t explain the heartbreak I’d witnessed before my eyes.

My last moment with you, my very last goodbye. 

I thanked you.

For what you gave to her, for how you made her feel.

And how that carried over, you were infectious.     

 You were real.

So I thanked you. 

I’ve never held back so many tears while wanting to cry so much and so hard. 

Lowering my gaze, staring off in the distance, 

I fought to stay strong, to keep up my guard.  

We can only fight so long. It’s proven to be true.

And at the end, I thanked you. ❀️

http://www.gofundme.com/danbelair  

A Salon Near You. Don’t Go Here

14 Mar

Another aspect of relocating that we women have to take into account, ok, some men I’m sure as well but I can’t speak for you. Beauty. I was with both my stylist and esthetician for most of my tenure in San Diego, so finding replacements, well, not that easy and oh so bittersweet. I’ve had 2 cuts since moving away, the first at a salon nearby the RV park we resided for a bit back in December, it was horrible, (the haircut not the park,) and after loathing my hair for months, I finally caved. To be honest I only let it last that long because most days Its comfy clothes or work clothes that are going to get dirty, so I let it slide, but a girl can only take so much. I was set to find someone near me that could get the job done. It’d be one thing if I could just put my hair in a ponytail and let it be. But damn it all to hell!! I can’t. Short hair. And there’s only so much a headband and hair clips can do with a bad cut. After much web searching and review reading I found one that stated, “I have short, fine hair and (I’ll call him Carl) gave me the best haircut in 15 years.”

Yay! That’s me! That’s what I need!! They also do waxing in the same salon, double yay (these brows are out of control!) Ok, let’s do this! Off to find me my replacement crew! 🀞🏻

Let’s start with the brow wax. There was no table or chair, or lamp over my brows for that matter, I sat in the shampoo sink. The wax was on the other side of a the wall so she’d go back and forth, and when she thought she was done and wanted me to look at my brows, I had to get up and walk to the other side of the wall to look in the mirror!!??? And when I pointed out she hadn’t even touched the brow canal that must always be clear, back the shampoo chair we go. No, just no.

Onward to the cut. πŸ˜” Here comes “Carl”! Who is also the owner of the salon, and he comes a roaring! I tell him I left my last stylist of over 8 years and his response is something along the lines of “Well, not to toot my own horn but, I’ve had clients for almost 40 years so it shouldn’t be a problem.” Bullet points of what I’d learned about him in those 45 mins; age, number of marriages/kids, marijuana stance, wife’s profession, also that she’s hot, I know how many pets/animals he has, DIY tips and how he feels about the homeless…. the list goes on, seriously, bc he didn’t stop talking the whole time!!! He did make an attemp and asked a few questions, I didn’t however get a chance to complete an answer bc he’d start with something else, which I didn’t really mind after the third or fourth attempt, hoping talking altogether would take a time out. I did come up in the conversation once or twice, about how lucky I was to have him cutting my hair. He was going to fix everything. (Yay!) Time to time he’d pause, lean on my chair, and talk about a thought that must’ve popped up in his head, looking at himself, in the mirror!!! And i will never understand why he lifted my chair up and down so damn much, with no use of shears most of the time!! At the end he stated that he was “My hero of the day,” and we can “Build on any criticism or issues we can change on my haircut the next visit.” Dude!! I’m here, in your chair, right now! Let’s start there!! He combed my hair so hard and flat to my head for the 40 mins or so that my forehead was sore for hours after I left!!!! 

I associate someone who refers to themselves as “Great”, or says such as, “Not to brag but,” to those that state, “I’m a great tipper.” It’s a warning sign. For all of us that know better in the industry, a “great tipper” is 10%-15%. Not the 20%-25% that great service actually deserves. At that point however, you can’t just say to that table “Get out,” or, in this instance, get up out of the chair and walk out. (Well maybe you could but I am not that callus.) 😫 Aaarrrgggghhhhhhh! How do I find someone that suits me, hell, I’ll settle for someone that won’t assault my scalp, without knowing a single person in the city for a referral? 

The search continues.